וַיִּשְׁלַח אֹתָם מֹשֶׁה אֶלֶף לַמַּטֶּה לַצָּבָא אֹתָם וְאֶת־פִּינְחָס בֶּן־אֶלְעָזָר הַכֹּהֵן לַצָּבָא וּכְלֵי הַקֹּדֶשׁ וַחֲצֹצְרוֹת הַתְּרוּעָה בְּיָדוֹ׃
Moses dispatched them on the campaign, a thousand from each tribe, with Pinchos son of Eleazar the priest on the campaign, equipped with the sacred utensils and the trumpets for sounding the blasts (31:6)
The commentary of Ba’al HaTurim points out that the Nasi (the Prince) of each tribe should have been sent to lead his soldiers. Moshe decided not to because it would have been conspicuous that the tribe of Shimon (Simon) would be missing its Nasi. Their prince was the man killed by Pinchos for his sinful act with a Midianite princess (as related in last week’s parsha). His absence would have embarrassed the tribe of Shimon so Moshe decided not to send any Nasi.
In time of war good leadership is essential and the princes would have contributed much to the war effort. Nevertheless, it was worth forgoing that in order to save the tribe of Shimon from embarrassment.
Great people went to great lengths to spare others from embarrassment. Rabbi Yehoshua Leib Diskin (1818-1898) would give a class on the parsha of the week every Saturday night. It was one student’s job to make him tea to drink while he was teaching and this person always added a heaping amount of sugar to the tea. One time he made a mistake and instead of adding a heaping amount of sugar he added a heaping amount of salt! The Rabbi drank the tea as he always did. When Rabbi Diskin’s wife realized the mistake she ran into the room and took the tea away from him. When the students found out what happened they were very curious to know how it tasted. So they took a sip. It tasted so horrible that they couldn’t believe how the rabbi was able to drink it!
Rabbi Diskin’s wife asked why he kept drinking it especially since so much salt was not good for him. He answered that he couldn’t embarrass someone for making an error.
Now you might say that it’s reasonable not to embarrass the tribe of Shimon because they were not responsible for the actions of their prince. But let’s take a look at another example of not causing someone embarrassment.
A few weeks ago we read how displeased Hashem was that Bilam chose to join the Moabite king Balak to curse the Jewish people. Hashem sent an angel that Bilam could not see but his donkey could. Each time the angel stood in their path the donkey veered off the path to the consternation of Bilam. Each time Bilam beat the donkey to get it to move on. After the third time the donkey miraculously began to speak and rebuked Bilam for beating it. Bilam was then given the ability to see the angel who chided him saying, “And when the donkey saw me she shied away because of me those three times. If she had not shied away from me, you are the one I should have killed, while sparing her (22:23).” Rashi cites the Midrash that the angel then said to Bilam, “But now because it (the donkey) spoke and rebuked you and you could not stand against its rebuke, I have killed it in order that people should not be able to say: This is the animal that silenced Balaam by its rebuke, so that he could not reply.” This is because Hashem has regard for human dignity (Midrash Tanchuma, Balak 9).
Bilam was clearly in the wrong. Not only that, the fact that his donkey spoke had no effect on Bilam whatsoever and he proceeded to try to curse the Jewish people. Nonetheless Hashem would not allow him that embarrassment.
This is a very important lesson about being sensitive to people’s shame and the delicate balance we must tread even when dealing with people in the wrong.
Hashem has regard for human dignity and we have a mitzvah to emulate His ways.
Shabbat Shalom!
Yitzchak